True Names

Right now, there is a lot of bad information being taught in regards to what name to use for things like petition papers.

Allow me to say this loud and clear:

A PERSON'S TRUE NAME IS THE FULL, LEGAL NAME THEY WERE BORN WITH. 

True names hold power. This is something that spans across just about all cultures. Just look at the story of Rumpelstiltskin. Or DC Comic's Mister Mxyzptlk.

I am such a geek, I know.

I've seen people online be instructed to:

-Use a person's nickname.

-Use the name a person has changed their name to.

-Use a person's married name.

And even:

-Use a person's online handle/screenname.

Dude. No. No no no. NO.

If all you know is one of the above, you can use that, but they should never, ever be used over a true name and should be bolstered with any other things you do know that can be used to identify them. This can include a birth date, one or both parents' names ("X, daughter of V and W"), zodiac sign, address ("X, whom resides at 123 Street St), etc.This is also a good tip for anyone whose target has an extremely common name, like "John Smith".

(This is, of course, assuming you do not have a personal concern of theirs. If you do, you already have a direct link to them and will have a much easier time even though you don't have a true name.)

Your true name is something that cannot change. You can change the name on your birth certificate, but not the fact that you were born as "John Smith".

There is this mistaken notion that the name a person has chosen to call themselves, including screennames, is much more personal, and therefor powerful. This is wrong because the power of one's true name does not lie in how personal or attached to it one is. I go by Dr. Trixie online, but that is an artificial thing, it only encompasses the parts of myself I like and wish to share. Your true name is everything about you, even the parts you don't like and wish to abandon and forget.

As a genderqueer individual and staunch LGBT rights activist, I completely understand that this gets very murky and even painful for transgendered people. Remember: a true name is just that, a name, an identifier. It is not a true identity as an identity is fluid. In this, and only this, situation, I tend to use the person's current name, especially since many people change their names to a feminine/masculine version of their birth name. The feminized/masculinized name is more properly in line with their spirit. Please show respect: a transgendered woman is not "a woman trapped in a man's body" or "born a man". She is a woman. The true name does not change that.

As far as married names go, if you do not know the person's original name, you can write something like "Dana Brown, wife/husband of Jordan Brown", plus the birth date and anything else you know.

If the person is a Jr., Sr., III, etc include that!

This current online culture where everyone befriends each other and goes to "hoodoo conventions" is unheard of in real life, with real workers. I used to go to this great little spiritual shop, owned by three real workers. Let me tell you, these guys did not even use their first names with customers, just initials. They knew exactly how much power names hold.